Feminism and Man-hating: My Perspective on Emma Watson’s Speech.

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The latest buzz on women’s rights has been on the speech delivered by Emma Watson. She was promoting HeForShe campaign launched by UN Women on September 20, 2014.^[1]

I’d like to pick up on her comment that, “the more I have spoken about feminism the more I have realized that fighting for women’s rights has too often become synonymous with man-hating.”^[2] I agree.

I have been working on women’s rights advocacy and implementation at the national level in Canada and overseas for 16 years. In that time I have been told by some people that they were surprised I didn’t hate men. They found it shocking that I (and colleagues of mine) even chose to engage men in the process to address and eliminate violence against women. An initial oversight, by many, is that the approach we take to eliminate violence against women includes addressing gender-based violence against men.

To exclude men in the process of establishing and implementing women’s rights is to exclude one significant contributor to the problem. How can we have women’s rights if one of the parties is not included in the conversation? And when I say conversation, I don’t mean a gathering where men are blamed or isolated. I also don’t mean a conversation where gender violence against men is not acknowledged. I mean a genuine exchange involving curiosity, understanding and collaboration.

Consider what Ms. Watson asked: “How can we affect change in the world when only half of it is invited or feel welcome to participate in the conversation?”

To isolate men undermines the aim of establishing women’s rights. It also undermines the aim to establish gender rights. 

Ms. Watson said, “I’ve seen young men suffering from mental illness unable to ask for help for fear it would make them look less “macho”…” and “I’ve seen men made fragile and insecure by a distorted sense of what constitutes male success. Men don’t have the benefits of equality either.”

She’s right. 

We need to engage all genders in addressing sexual and gender based violence in order to eliminate it. 

I’m not saying women who have experienced violence by men should necessarily sit with them, make peace and establish rights. I am saying that a process needs to take place. 

In safe spaces women and men, separate from each other, need to acknowledge the suffering they have experienced, come to terms with it and work on healing. Compassion and understanding of oneself and each other needs to be a part of the process.

A genuine dialogue needs to take place with all genders. We need to examine how we have come to a place where women, the root of communities, are devalued and how men are stripped of the ability to feel and be vulnerable. We need to do so with compassion and curiosity. 

My hats off to Emma for delivering a speech with a very strong and simple message to engage each other. It is my hope that the HeForShe campaign bridges divides, helps eliminate sexual and gender based violence and helps establish and reinforce women's rights. 

I would love to hear your thoughts. Leave a comment or question and I will be sure to reflect and respond.

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[1] http://www.heforshe.org/fr/

[2] http://www.unwomen.org/en/news/stories/2014/9/emma-watson-gender-equality-is-your-issue-too#sthash.pwhgBFHx.dpuf or https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gkjW9PZBRfk

Palestine, Israel & Our Common Humanity

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I took a few days from posting stuff on Facebook and just scrolled through posts. I read posts from friends and acquaintances living in Israel. My friend is a father, promoter of peace, advocate for intercultural dialogue and cycle activist. Another has been working on global intercultural dialogue for years. I read a blog of an Israeli woman living close to where Hamas rockets had landed. She tells her story of her little one running to her in the middle of the night several times saying they have to run to safety. She knows they are safe due to the Iron Dome and yet she is acutely aware that Palestinian families are not. Her son is safe. Their sons and daughters are not.

I read Israel Defence Forces (IDF) Solider accounts of how they feel about what they do and orders they need to carry out.[1] I had to stop reading when I read one account where the soldier’s superior admitted his order was one of many war crimes he was committing.

I read post upon post from Palestinian friends and supporters around the world identifying the disproportionate death count of Palestinians to Israelis. Access to water is grossly depleted and sewage and wastewater treatment systems are being hit by Israeli air strikes.[2] War crimes are being committed. Article 8 of the Rome Statute of the International Criminal Court, section 2 b) i and ii states that a war crime includes: 

Intentionally directing attacks against the civilian population as such or against individual civilians not taking direct part in hostilities; 

Intentionally directing attacks against civilian objects, that is, objects which are not military objectives.[3]

I read today of an intern, working for an organization where Palestinians and Israelis work together to end the occupation and resolve the conflict non-violently, whose cousin was killed yesterday by Israeli fire.[4] His two brothers were causalities in Operation Cast Lead. It was too much to bear. I cried. 

I watched a debate in the British Parliament dated July 15, 2014 -  MPs acknowledging how messed up the situation is and asking how long before something is done?[5] I sat there so very angry.

Talking is important but so is action. It must be collective, in my opinion, if it is going to make a change now and going to end the physical and emotional violence of a people living on the land as well as the diaspora of both the Palestinians and Jews who feel a connection to Israel.

I want to hear a conversation and see focused non-violent direct action. I want it to be known that this violence is unacceptable from any of the actors involved. How we choose to address the conflict is key. We must do it as human beings who recognize our common humanity.

There are people and communities working within Palestine/Israel and outside of it to bring peace through non-violent action. In addition to Facebook posts on the human face to this tragedy, I want to hear and see more about what we can and are doing to end it.

I would love for you folk to share your comments on non-violent ways to address and end this conflict.

On commenting on her right to defend the human rights of Gazans, a friend posted a few quotes. Let me leave you with this:

“We cannot live for ourselves alone. Our lives are connected by a thousand invisible threads, and along these sympathetic fibers, our actions run as causes and return to us as results.” ~ Herman Melville

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[1] “Breaking the Silence.” http://www.breakingthesilence.org.il/

[2] Qandil, Ala. “Gaza Faces Imminent Water Crisis.” July 17, 2014. http://www.aljazeera.com/news/middleeast/2014/07/gaza-faces-imminent-water-crisis-201471755035576420.html

[3] Rome Statute. July 2002. http://www.icc-cpi.int/NR/rdonlyres/ADD16852-AEE9-4757-ABE7-9CDC7CF02886/283503/RomeStatutEng1.pdf

[4] Marlowe, Jen.“Each one is a world.” http://donkeysaddle.wordpress.com/2014/07/16/the-message-you-dread/

[5] July 15, 2014. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJWNE83j__k&app=desktop

Who's to Blame?

A friend posted a poem, You Men, on Facebook recently (scroll past the Spanish version to read the English text) with the following comment: English version underneath. Its only 350 years old. We've come on rapidly haven't we? 

On the site it said that the author was, “…an exceptional seventeenth-century nun who set precedents for feminism long before the term or concept existed.”

As I read the poem I could feel the anger and frustration of this woman. The underlying sentiment was that women cannot win one way or another. That, in fact, they are subjected to the decisions of men who don’t even realize the impact their decisions and actions have on women and ultimately themselves.  Fair point. Especially given the day and age it was written in. I also cannot dismiss the relevance of this sentiment today.

That said the post made me pause. The friend who posted the poem is male. I wondered if he loathed himself and/or men as much as this woman did. I wondered whether he was able to see the part we all share in the disempowerment of women.  

Working on women’s rights I have been exposed to people who blame men for the disempowerment of women. I agree that men play a part in this and yet, it concerns me when the role women play in our disempowerment is not recognized as well. 

Working to end violence against women is tough. Men need to become self-aware of the power they have, due to our patriarchal society, to disempower women. They also need to recognize the role they play in reinforcing a system that denies men to live a holistic experience which allows them to express themselves in a healthy way. 

Women need to become aware of how deeply the patriarchal system influences them and how they reinforce the system that discriminates against them. They also need to break free from it without violence and with compassion. To be hostile towards men and to lack compassion only contributes to the emotional and structural violence[1] imposed by patriarchy.  It’s not an easy thing to do but it is important nonetheless.

Ending violence against women requires all of us to acknowledge how we all contribute to it. We need to acknowledge the impact violence against women has on men. We also need to brainstorm on how to address it within our situational contexts. We need to have dialogues with each other to understand what the root causes are. We need to practice forgiveness not only with others but more importantly with ourselves.   

We all, women and men, have a role we play in the disempowerment and empowerment of women.

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[1] “Structural/Cultural/Direct Violence-Johan Galtung.” Turning The Tide, http://turning-the-tide.org/files/Structural%20Cultural%20Direct%20Violence%20Hand-out.pdf

Why Women, Peace and Security?

I’ve been working specifically on Women, Peace and Security issues since 2007. Of all the areas to focus on with regards to women’s rights I am asked, from time to time, why Women, Peace and Security?

I see women as agents of change. When there is a conflict that needs a resolution, it is important to bring ALL stakeholders to the table. Too often women are missing from this table. 

As wars rage between governments, rebels and terrorists, and as stakeholders try to stop the conflict, women -  whether a rape victim, combatant, refugee, internally displaced person, parliamentarian, activist, freedom fighter, or just someone caught up in an armed conflict – women must be a part of the resolution if it is going to be sustainable. Think about it, if you don’t have all perspectives considered and acknowledged, and you don’t have an agreement to commit to a resolution from all stakeholders, resolving conflict will simply not work.

In 2001 the Security Council, the body of the United Nations in charge of the maintenance of global peace and security, passed a resolution explicitly acknowledging, for the first time, the integral role women have in conflict resolution processes. This is Security Council Resolution (SCR) 1325 on Women, Peace and Security. It also acknowledges violence committed against women in armed conflict as well as the need to address and eliminate it.  

SCR 1325 is the first of a suite of resolutions committed to empowering women to be at the decision-making tables to end conflict. 

I want to help empower women and men with conflict resolution skills to transform conflict, peace-build and eliminate sexual gender-based violence.  

Women are the root of communities. Through them communities grow. Women’s life experiences impact youth, who turn into adults who contribute to societies that we live in. In armed conflict people’s minds, spirits, and bodies are broken. Sexual and gender-based violence exacerbates this. 

I work on Women, Peace and Security because I have seen how the voice and perspective of women help transform conflict, help in the healing process, and contribute to peace-building. I want to support this process.

Through a series of blogs there will be an exploration of the role women, men, boys and girls have in raising the voice of women with the aim of contributing to the resolution of conflict in a way that leads to sustainable, positive change.  

There will be an interactive component as the blogs progress so that your voice can be heard. Through the exchange we will see how we all can and do contribute to Women, Peace and Security. 

I invited you to leave a comment with your thoughts and stay tuned for more to follow.

Jo Rodrigues

Gender Equality and Conflict Resolution Consultant

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